This is originally for a friend, but I think this message applies as much to me as many of you out there:
When I heard that you said that the most recent Linkin Park song connects with you, I went and listen to their recent songs. And out of the three that I saw the MVs on, I think the one you connected with was Heavy although you didn’t mention explicitly which one it is.
However, it is not a message I wanted to give on the new chapter of your life, even if you feel that it’s nothing special and it’s just another monotonous year ahead. I wanted to pick something from their new album, an album which holds a special significance due to Chester’s departure and I know that what he felt, the thoughts that was running through his head, are also what we have both felt at different times of our lives, or maybe even right now this very moment. It is not something I’d want to shy away from but at the same time I think what had happened would cement the message that the band which you love so much is trying to convey, what I am trying to convey.
I know we have not been speaking to each other, verbally or otherwise, as much as we used to, mostly due to my constraint of time. And despite being something we had foreseen, this insight does not lessen the impact it has on us. Yet, I’m sure that this isn’t something that’ll stop my from caring about you and I wanted you to understand that as well.
So, this is how this song is chosen instead. You might ask, how is a song about passing on relatable and even fitting as a medium to talk about living on?
Should’ve stayed, were there signs, I ignored?
Can I help you, not to hurt, anymore?
We saw brilliance, when the world, was asleep
There are things that we can have, but can’t keep
People tend to be oblivious, anyone can be suffering from depression or other emotional trauma but we usually notice the physical wounds. It could be that friendly cat-lady who greet you every morning or the strict manager who always nick-pick at your work. Not every wound manifests in the visible forms. And I understand. I don’t think what you are feeling is ridiculous. Sometimes I just wish I could help even a little, to ease the pain or the emptiness there; to put goals and tiny little sparks of happiness in your days.
You are a unique and brilliant person by your own virtue. You might not see it, and it’s cheesy but, the world is asleep and blinded to wonders sometimes, but, I see it in you. The You that’s so precious amidst the countless sparkling stars. And I don’t know what future will bring, maybe it’s bleak or maybe it’s great, but I just want to value what we have here, right now. I’m not “live in the moment” type of person, yet I want you to know every moment we have is treasured by me. Just like “us”, there’s a lot of things in life also that is brief fleeting. Regardless, I still hope you can enjoy the joy they bring instead of worrying how they are going to be gone. I know I do that too much.
If they say
Who cares if one more light goes out?
In the sky of a million stars
It flickers, flickers
Who cares when someone’s time runs out?
If a moment is all we are
Or quicker, quicker
Who cares if one more light goes out?
Well I do
Not everyone we care, but there are people we care about – and they matters to us. Who cares if we will all turn to dust in the end, why does what we do and who we are matters then, right? But it does. You do. You shape the world with your presence, be it if are just a tiny flower blooming by the roadside or an astounding boom in the air.
You might not know how much a gesture you do meant to someone else, and sometimes we’ll never know. But trust me it does because I remember tiny gestures, from countless people that I might have even forgotten the names but those things they did? They made things better for me. So I’m sure yours will as well. You won’t be erased as the universe erase you. Paradoxical but the world is like that, full of tiny paradoxes.
It is in the passing of one that one learns to value the living, the insignificant people around us. And also us, ourselves that we have often taken for granted for the most. You might have dark thoughts, heck I do too. We might think our lives are meaningless, that we’re better off lying in the dusty bed under the sun and rain but maybe…
Just a tiny little maybe…… We’re not.
And so, in spite of the purpose the band wrote this song for, this is my own duality spin to it.